There's a strong connection and comparison between family as the domestic church and parish community being the larger household.
What do you do if a member of the parish community do you harm, hurt you, knowingly or unknowingly? Do you keep it to yourself? Do you ignore it? forget it? Let it go? Move on? Anyway, stuff happens? Do you go straight to social media, rant, blow it out? Do you retreat or lock in your room in isolation? Do you resort to violence? Or settle things down, don’t do anything and let God take care of it…
This Sunday’s theme stresses the importance of fraternal correction leading us to the core value of communal life. The lived experience, the shared life of the Matthean community offers a 3-step process to handle and resolve conflicts and how to deal with serious sins in order to bring the sinner back to God and the church. We know well that although nowadays, there are different ways of dealing with conflicts and difficult issues depending on the magnitude and severity of the situation, the church handles it differently as the school for a deeper humanity (GS 62). As it looks, it may not sound practical because we resolve matters differently depending on the gravity and seriousness of the situation. Nevertheless, the parish community exists not for the individual but for the well- being wider community and the harmony of each other’s relationships which reflects Christ.
If your brother sins (against you), go, talk to him, tell him his fault privately just between the two of you. Do everything to win him back. Do everything to salvage the relationship for the sake of the community. Make every effort to bring back the sinner. Know and understand that your sole purpose is aimed at reconciliation that is, to regain the member and not to shame the individual. Do it in charity, out of love and care for the offender and not by rebuke, condemnation, and condescension. Be nice and kind. Your intent is nothing but reconciliation and not retribution, nor revenge. If he listens to you, you won him over. You have regained him which is the end-goal. Although the sins that are addressed here are the serious and grave ones and not small matters, it can be anything for as long damage has been done. If he doesn’t listen to you, bring one or more witnesses to emphasize the severity of the issue. If after the involvement of two individuals, he/she doesn’t cooperate, take the matter to the church (ekklesia) and let the church take care of it, for where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.
The 3-step procedure underlines the need to listen to both sides of the story in the interest of the community. Fraternal correction is not meant as a harsh rebuke but an act of love to help see the wrongdoing. This is done to highlight/show the seriousness of the action and assist in the repentance.
The prophet Ezekiel, a man of God, described himself as the watchman whose job is to remind his people and straighten things out. As a watchman, if he doesn't say anything nor do anything about a disaster ready to unfold and something happened, he will be held accountable. St. Paul in his letter to the Romans tells us that love is the fulfillment of the law. The amazing blend between the law of love and the love of the law is interesting. It emphasized the spirit of the teaching, of doctrine, of the law.
The process may not work for us modern believers but it tells us how they understood faith and its application to community life. When they came together, it wasn’t a private matter. It is in the church that they are nourished, sustained, encouraged, condemned and rebuked. Whatever you do, wherever you are, you represent the church. For better for worse, you belong to the family and this community. Amen.
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May God bless you abundantly!
Bishop Edward J. Weisenburger